Dear Diary ,
" My Friend, you are a parent !!!! " These words belong to my Engg. Roommate Vishal . Years have passed and till date I cherish these words as possibly one of the best compliments of my life :) . For me relations have always been more about giving ..... and so far in my life i have mostly been into relations where my giving has been well reciprocated . So all in all (barring Shweta ) I have been very lucky with relations and hence the motto of my life has been to Give without worrying about whats coming in return .And if you measure up the returns I'd say I have got substantial returns ... returns which mite not be more or equal to what I gave but definitely in tone to suit my requirements .After all these years I havent had a bad person who has been a part of my ...Thats how lucky i have been in the relation front .I as have mentioned in one of my previous entries, I have the world's best parents , best relatives , bestest Friends ..... super nice office colleagues .. all in all , i've had the best deals possible :)
It is said that in every relationship there are two ppl , one who cares and the other who cares more . And it is is said that it is always difficult to be the second one . Well i seem to have a knack of almost always being the second one. Barring a few relations like i share with my Mum , Dad & Bro , i have been the more caring one in almost all the other relations ( and aint i really proud about it ) .... I realise that i guess i am made that way :) and just cant help it :)
U must be wondering what i am trying to say here .... well i am just getting there ......
Here is a fact about me ... I cant take care of myself ... just cant ..not even a little bit ...i can try and take care of the whole world but not myself .... however hard i try i just cant end up putting in an effort for myself !!! Why ??? maybe coz i have always been taken care of throughout my life ... initally by the family and then by my friends .... I have always have the priviledge of having people around me who i could take care of and in return got cared :) . But off lately things have changed quite a bit .... i still mite have those great people in my life but there seems to be a geographical divide that separates us .... being me i try my best to take care of them ( one advantage that i have over most ppl is that i am single , am an insomniac , that givs me a lot of spare hours each day .. ) So basically I dont get to take care of people the way i would like to .... and thus eventually i end up getting nthing in return . And this i has not been nice ... i mite help a few strangers here and there regularly but those are small helps ... nothing substantial ... these wld never qualify to caring ..... i miss being cared for .. but the thing that i miss the most is Caring for ..... I just wish Shmi Would let me care for her ...... I just wish .....
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